I had a dream, a true story
Like many of you, I sometimes dream in movies.
By movies I mean dreams with enough plot points and characters to qualify as a complete story. I also mean the kind of dreams in which I am seldom a direct participant and never myself.
Given that I’ve never met the director of these “movie dreams,” I have a feeling that their contents are not so much about me as they are about the world I live in — the place we call society.
It doesn’t take a fancy degree or an ideological leap of faith to recognize that society is both a snapshot of the world as well as its blueprint. We make up society but society is also what makes us.
That there is an element of make-believe in society is also not surprising. Consider the canny gubernatorial campaign of candidate Arnold Schwarzenegger, whose last two official interviews before Election Day were given to the entertainment television tabloids “Entertainment Tonight” and “Access Hollywood.”
Schwarzenegger, as we all know, is a star and movie stars, as we have been told, rise and fall, shine brightly and fade away. That we refer to film and television actors as stars (and not, say, diamonds) is no accident. Like the far-away suns that are visible only at night, movie actors shine brightest in the darkened halls of movie theaters. And, like the stars in the sky, the Hollywood variety are forever out-of-reach; distant, enigmatic and alluring.
From time immemorial, celestial stars have brightened our stories and, literally, illuminated our darkest hours. We cherish stars, not only because they help us navigate on earth, but also because they help us get through the night.
As visual creatures, we have good reason to dread (or welcome) the cover of night. As the sun sets, our world is gradually engulfed by shadows until, in darkness, the familiar object or sound becomes suddenly unfamiliar and menacing. Yet, curiously, we do not flee from this darkness but, rather, embrace it — by sleeping.
At night, we “fall” asleep and in doing so cast our minds into the void of unconsciousness. It is during this rehearsal of death, this eight-hour sojourn through the valley of the shadow, that we are guided (or led astray) by our own inner light: the dream.
In my case, one of the most memorable movie dreams I have had recently featured none other than Arnold Schwarzennegger.
In my dream, I was on the set of the movie “Apocalypse Now,” on a patrol boat in the Philippines. The production crew was rehearsing scenes with Mr. Schwarzennegger as a candidate for the role of Captain Willard.
Standing on the deck of the ship, an aptly costumed Mr. Schwarzenegger addressed the camera off-screen, while just behind him stood Martin Sheen, the actor originally cast to play the role of Captain Willard. As Mr. Schwarzenegger said his lines, I could tell Sheen was keenly if politely observant of his would-be replacement.
That’s where the dream — or my recollection of it — ends. Weak as the plot may be, it had a stark, understated realism. Schwarzenegger, looking sweaty, dirty and tired, looked right for the part. This was ragged rather than rugged determination.
Unlike his role in “Predator,” where Schwarzenegger plays an unarmed soldier who is hunted down by a high-tech and savage alien in the jungles of Latin America, in this apocryphal scene from “Apocalypse Now” the actor’s bulk hung on his frame like a heavy conscience.
But there’s a chance I was deceived by only witnessing such a short scene. Perhaps, once cast as Captain Willard, Schwarzenegger would have relied on his physique to efficiently and quietly “terminate with extreme prejudice” the errant Colonel Kurtz (Marlon Brando). Perhaps, his Captain Willard would execute the mission without pangs of guilt, avoiding any second thoughts about the larger conflict with the same ease with which he would undoubtedly dodge enemy fire.
As I write this, the candidate Schwarzenegger is still a few hours from learning whether or not he will get to play the role of California’s governor for the next three years.
Although my dream of his audition for the role of Captain Willard took place just a few weeks ago, it may have been inspired by a news report I’d read three months ago.
On July 4, 2003, the Washington Post described the actor Schwarzenegger’s visit to U.S. troops stationed in Iraq. Here is an excerpt from that story:
A few were invited to join Arnold Schwarzenegger for a screening at Baghdad International Airport of the muscle-bound actor’s latest movie, Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.
Schwarzenegger addressed a rambunctious crowd of soldiers in one of Hussein’s former presidential palaces located inside the airport compound.
“It is really wild driving around here, I mean the poverty, and you see there is no money, it is disastrous financially and there is the leadership vacuum, pretty much like in California right now,” he said.
One month later, on August 6, 2003, Schwarzenegger declared his candidacy for governor of California on the late-night television program the “Tonight Show” with Jay Leno.
I’ll never know just how the alternate version of “Apocalypse Now” I glimpsed in my dreams would have played itself out. Nor do I think I will ever get to see Schwarzenegger, as actor or governor, in a scene where his will to power, his need to complete the mission, is put to a moral rather than a physical test.
And while Americans in 2003 may enjoy seeing actor Martin Sheen as the fantasy President of the United States on the television program “The West Wing,” they would likely reject a reprisal of Sheen’s Captain Willard, wending his way into the heart of darkness on the Tigris river.
postscript
What of Mr. Bush’s own mission? “There is no doubt in my mind we’re doing the right thing. Not one doubt.” Eyeless in Iraq, The New York Review of Books.
What of the real soldiers fighting in the real war in Iraq? Their belief in Bush’s confidence may be waning. [10/30/2003]